Witty Answers To Questions Of Typical Next-Door-Aunties. . .

We all have been in a position where those “typical” aunties come up to us with a sweet smile and ask, “How are you doing beta?” followed by much-dreaded questions. These aunties are everywhere. If you are not married, they will ask “When are you getting married?” and if you are married they will ask “When are you planning to extend your family?” These questions are never-ending and damn irritating! You almost wish you can answer back but mostly can’t because of so-called ‘Sanskaars’! However, here are few witty answers that you can give the next time you encounter one of these typical aunties:

  1. What are you doing about your weight?
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    Whether you are underweight or overweight, this question normally comes up. This is one of the most irritating questions and sometimes all you can do is smile. However, the next time you face this question, try giving an answer like this, “Dressing it in awesome clothes and flaunting it.” Or “Moving it through space with power, grace, and joy.”
  2. Are you single?
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    People are often very curious about your personal life and very often you are asked the question whether you are single or you are seeing someone. Next time you want to avoid the question about your relationship status, give an answer such as, “I was. Until now.” And then walk away. The whole evening will be spent wondering what you really meant 😛
  3. When are you going to have children?
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    Whether you have been married for a month, a year or 4 years, this question is inevitable. There would always be few such aunties who would be waiting to ask this. The next time you face this and feel like just walking away, wait, answer something like this and then walk. Here is what you should say,” We are not. We will go Brangelina way and do well to those homeless kids.” Those aunties will faint with shock!
  4. Oh my, when did you grow up so much?
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    This is one of the questions that maybe each of us has heard while growing up and we normally don’t have anything to say in return. However, if you have no patience left to face this once again, give answers such as,” At 3.31 pm” or “well, since I can’t shrink, I grow up.”
  5. Did you get a haircut?
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    You are flaunting evidently shorter hair and you keep on facing this question. You can reply,” No, I am shedding my hair since it’s autumn.”
  6. Cover image source

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